The Stock Market

Fellas, today we are gonna discuss how your stock drops with women! 

I am pretty sure this will be pegged as yet another man bashing post but who cares? 

I will ALWAYS give it to you straight! That's who I am and my blog is based on my life and how I view it. In a nutshell, fuck your opinions because I speak FACTS!

A lot of you look so good on paper! Hell, a lot of you look good period ( I won't pretend looks haven't kept some dudes around for me before as it has with many other women). However, that holds about a much weight as said paper, when it really counts.

You know what makes you lose value with us, guys?

THE LIES!

I really can't say this enough. I am seeing that now that I am back in the dating game, men are STILL lying about their intentions.

I am thinking because I am older and wiser that surely the men I encounter will be too. They will be more stable financially, have a blossoming career and be ready to be in ONE solid, stable relationship.

My friends and acquaintances are looking for the same thing. We are that, so we look for that. We look for someone we are equally yoked with. We are getting everything BUT!

It never made sense to me for a person to pretend they have it all together and present one person to you when they are another.

You guys have GOT to stop sending your representatives to meet us and then showing up with the real you later! It's just not fair!

I don't want you talking about how you meet us with long hair and it's weave or pretty nails and it's acrylics or a slim waist and it's a waist shaper, because it's totally NOT the same thing! That is the physical! 
If you want to go there we can though.

We meet you with six packs,  fresh hair cuts, casket sharp and smelling like a dream and three months down the line your always in sweats or shorts, Nike sandals with socks and smelling like day old sweat!

You're standing next to us mean mugging the dude who looks like you did when we met you cuz he can't believe YOU bagged one of US!

By the way, he's well past the stage of lying and knows exactly what he wants, he is the ONLY person representing himself and he's ready to scoop us up because he knows a good investment when he sees one.
Marinate on THAT!

Is it sinking in yet? No? Allow me to continue...

You know damn well that you aren't ready to take us home to your mom's so stop trying to get in good with the fam (especially to a child of a single mother) just to have sex! That's only going to push you to the top of the douche pool.

Trust the dating world in your area is smaller than you  think and people talk. It's gonna catch up to you! That's pretty desperate and saying shit like, "You can't unfuck me!" Takes major points off..and makes you a pathological liar!

Your homies laugh but when you wanna holla at his sister who just finished grad school and moved back locally (you know the one whose body milk did really good), guess who's NOT in her future husband pool? You think he'd EVER let YOU near HER?

You guys also seem to forget that the older WE get, the older YOU get. By the time you get prepared to find the one, the next generation of men, who are smarter, more ambitious, more mature, more virile (yeah, I mean his stamina is on point) and into US.

See, we are bonds that have increased in face value and have matured, and they want to invest. They set up coupon dates from the gate and know we are worth far more than out issue price. And you guys are like pyramid schemes. You recruit all these women who invest in you with the promise of a high return only to have it all come crumbling down because you're a fraud! 
Then you will be the first to say, "I can't find a good woman!"

Stop frontin'! There's no future in it! Be successful no matter your position in life. If you're unhappy, change it! There is such thing as as speaking things into existence HOWEVER, you can't say you own your own business, like a barbershop for example and you're renting a chair! THAT'S A LIE! We get so sick of you all saying you are a boss when you're not. Bosses don't have to tell people, you can see it. Unless you're Rick Ross, stop chanting about how much of a boss you are! We know you're lying!

This post isn't long enough to cover all the variables in the treachery of the lies and the cut throat ways you use to get to the top of the dating world. I don't have that kind of time. I'm busy sifting through the bull to get to the real.

You are not very good at playing the market. Not at all. You are a bad investment, you never mature and your face value...well, you have none.

So, remember that all the time you spend will you take risks with lying, we have stock options just like you do. We are doing our research, we're shopping around and looking for a better broker than YOU!

Believe me, there is always one that's high yielding (we reap great benefits), has a fixed rate (remember my consistency post? Yeah...that part!) And the return on our investment is 100 times greater than YOURS!

"The main purpose of the stock market is to make fools of as many men as possible."

Bernard Baruch

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/stock_market.html#r4ybpyszqHlb6VoI.99

Can You Be More Specific?

*Names have been omitted because we don't BOTH need to be douches*

Let me start off by saying,  I DON'T think I am everyone's cup of tea. That's not realistic to think I would be. However, if you give a description of what you like (of course, this is in reference to online/blind dating)  and I fit that description, of COURSE I will think we may be compatible!  What person in their right mind wouldn't? Notice I said might. I say might because there are so many variables to our personalities, we can't assume a base make up of us can give way to the complexities of us. Again, it's not realistic.

If we're talking and connecting and then you describe what you want, that person...okay, I, will no doubt think I have a shot in the dark.

Clearly, there is much more than what is being said. People are afraid to look shallow by stating exactly what they want. The catch to that is, you appear even MORE shallow when you blow them off after getting a picture or by not responding AT ALL! 

There are a few things wrong in that equation and not being specific enough can cause a problem.

Point and case, the conversation I saved from above happened a while back (disregard the three days ago) and I knew I would want to address it so I saved it. You all know by now my blog postings are random and my busy life (and Aries procrastinating)  don't allow me to post as often as I should. 

I digress. The gentleman above described me (well, what he wanted which IS me!) and asked for pictures. I, not being shy when I am comfortable enough, will share face and body pictures. I am not trying to hide or have anyone be surprised by me being a BBW. I sent the pics as requested. I am still waiting for a response (No, I'm not really, but you understand my sarcasm).

Over the years I have discovered when using the term BBW, there's levels to this shit. I, to this day don't get it, but I get it. I have been called: thick, fat, phat, BBW, super sized BBW (to me that's stupid because I am a big, beautiful woman period. And I guess that's some man's way of saying, "She's not a size 12 like the BBW models, she's more like a size 18, homie!). I just know I am big, I am beautiful and very much a woman. When you say, "Not into skinny women." The opposite of that is fat! My headshots don't even look like I am anything less than fat so I don't Catfish with headshots like they claim BBWs do. I look like a BBW! However, you won't get Jill Scott BBW, I am more Mo'Nique when she was on the Parker's BBW. If you meant Jill and get something else, IT COULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED HAD YOU BEEN MORE SPECIFIC! Women turn down men we are not attracted to, politely, DAILY!  

I won't ever go in on a dude for that. Ever. I won't hold a grudge or cry about it. I DO feel some type of way about him not ever replying though. It's just...RUDE!

I am not the average sized woman. That's no secret. Me being smart, ladylike, having my ducks in a row AND attractive isn't either! I AM someone you can take home to momma. Even with odds against me for being a single mother, I am a catch.

I am smart, witty, confident, self-sufficent, black and I am NOT skinny ..if that's what you're actually into and not just saying you are.

I am not for closeted BBW lovers. I won't be a secret, be hidden from your friends and family or be the side chick. I won't be punished emotionally or abused mentally for being a BBW. If you are uncomfortable being seen with me, I promise you will never have to. I'll ensure you won't ever see me again. I am fine with that. C'est la vie!

You might win some but you just lost one...